Fire and Theft!
I had no dilema about the recipient of my spare seeds. Apologies to the others, but once I got a message from Liz at Nutty Gnome, it was all over. If you read her blog, you’ll know about her Christmas suprise from the local scumbags. If you don’t, you can find out all about it here.
Anyway, as well as losing the potting shed’s contents including tools, old tins of paint, Mr Liz’s porn stash and no doubt an old bicycle that no one was ever going to do up, she also lost her pots, propagators and seeds.
Now, I do know if that some twat torched my shed I’d be out at night, creeping around, seeking them out with a crossbow. It’s the best weapon for taking out arseholes, being accurate and silent. Of course, when I say silent, I mean relatively silent. Try firing one in a library and listen to the tuts from the elderly at the reading table! Naturally, that’s a joke (the bit about shooting a twat through the neck, not the bit about the library) because it would be illegal and very very wrong, so don’t do it, any of you, ever.
Liz – the seeds are on their way; well, they’re on the kitchen table waiting for me to walk to the post box!
So that’s the fire; now for theft. I have a thief. In my garden. An artichoke thief. Yes indeed, something (or someone; I haven’t ruled out the old lady down the lane) has been digging up the artichokes. Whatever (or whoever) it is doesn’t want them, because they are leaving them behind, but they obviously think there’s something down there that they do want.
As a result, I have artichoke overload. I have about 12 kilos of the things. I have discovered that I can cook them, puree them and then pop them in the freezer. Tonight we are having venison three ways (scotch egg made of a quails egg wrapped in venison and black pudding mince; vension liver very lightly fried, and venison loin) along with an artichoke gratin with port and juniper sauce. Then I shall keep the ten best looking tubers for planting in March, and the rest will be frozen.
So, there you have it. Now, if you don’t mind, I have scotch eggs to make!