The Idiot Gardener

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Scot Plants Direct – The Bad Penny?

Well, well, well; does anyone remember Scot Plants Direct? No? Then you’re bloody lucky.
Way back when I was a mere gardening newbie idiot rather than a gardening idiot with two years’ of failing behind me, I purchased the Jiffy Pellets that started Jiffygate from a company called Scot Plants Direct. Now, in the eyes of the law, the liability of the failures of those pellets was down to the retailer, Scot Plants Direct, and under the Sale of Goods Act Scot Plants Direct was liable. That’s not my opinion; that’s the law. Written by lawyers and judges. And not open to interpretation. By Scot Plants Direct. Or anyone else.

Of course, Jiffygate became best known for the pathetic and childish bleatings of one Jeremy Howarth, who showed that he – and the Jiffy Group – were shallow uncaring bastards who put profit before customers. It’s all been well documented. Also, the top brass at Jiffy Group were made aware of the issues, and whilst they did spend a considerable amount of time following the saga (and my rantings on-line), they never had the balls to speak up.

At the time, I contacted Scot Plants Direct, not to request a refund nor to complain, but to ask – yes, just to ask – if they had ever encountered such mouldiness before. I received a response from P Kean (no, still not sure if it’s a Martha or Arthur) basically telling me to bugger off. However, once the emails starting flying between Jiffy HQ and Idiot Towers, P Kean decided to do what the law required (or to appear to do what the law required), and contacted me to offer a full refund. P Kean, however, wasn’t telling the truth when he/she told me I would receive a refund, and to this day I have never received further word, nor a penny of my money. It wasn’t a lot, and to be honest I became so fascinated by the shit service that the Jiffy Group was handing out that I forgot about the scoundrels at Scot Plants Direct who had lied to me.

Just today, I received a comment on my earlier post, from Paul. Now, to be honest, I know nothing about Paul; it’s the internet, so he could be a gorgeous blond with large bosoms pretending to be a gardening bloke (makes a change from gardening blokes pretending to be a gorgeous blond with large bosoms, I suppose). He wanted to know how I got on with Scot Plants Direct, because he’s had a load of failed plants off them and he’s none too happy with the way they’ve treated him.

Let me put it this way, Paul; if you receive just a small fraction of what I got from them, or if you receive tenfold what I received, or even a hundredfold what I received, then you’ll still have the same thing.

Fuck all.

Scot Plants Direct. They lied to me and breached the Sale of Goods Act. I lost a few pounds. I learned a lesson about them. I fear that Paul might have lost a bit more.

Scot Plants Direct. Don’t forget that name.

P Kean. Not Keen. And not keen to refund your money!


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13 thoughts on “Scot Plants Direct – The Bad Penny?

  1. gwirrel

    I’ll try to remember that name – and hopefully remember it because they’re crap rather than assuming they must be good.

    I’ve had some crap service off Crocus, they’re taking over the world and everyone seems to suck their proverbial balls, yet I’ve had dead plants arrive, plants arrive and then do nothing (black elder, now 4 years old and not even a foot tall) and wrong plants arrive – they did fuck all about the wrong plant btw.

  2. Tom Stephenson

    Think yourself lucky that Scot Plants Direct did not use ParcleForce to send the pellets. They would have travelled via Nova Scotia, then ended up with you 3 months later, broken as well as mouldy, and you would not have received a penny in compensation from them either. (Maybe they did?)

  3. JohnD

    Scot Plants Direct – don’t know them at all, or, jiffygate. Guess I (we) are lucky. Link your ealier posts so I can read about this saga. It’s only things like this that keep a lonely elder gardene’s day schedule full of things to do! LOL!

  4. Sue

    Profit before people????
    Welcome to the UNITED STATES—where it’s been that way for ages.
    And now we have LAWS that say you can’t badmouth a company. Oh, it just gets better and better all the time……….

  5. The Owl Wood

    Before I read your post I spent five minutes trying to remember the name of those disc-like brown boiled sweets I used to love and buy in quarter pounds in a white paper bag back in the days when quarter pounds and white paper bags were still legal.

    Then I wondered if I was mistaken and the photograph was an electron microscope polaroid of a blood cell sample. New specs for me, methinks.

    Anyway. Upshot. I get all of my plants from the neighbours in the village. We have only the one streetlight and they are all elderly, there’s really very little risk of detection. So far I’ve had no problems and only the one failure (an experimental cannabis from Betty Scrivener’s greenhouse, I think I over-watered it or under-fed it or something).

  6. Theanne and Baron

    Service? Refunds? What’s that? Practically non existent in the USofA…when you find a shop that gives service AND refunds you want to cry…from happiness…because it’s been so long since you experienced these things!

  7. Turling

    Sons of bitches! Where are their offices? I have the right mind to…oh, wait, where are their offices? If they aren’t within 5 miles, then they’ll get a letter. Anyway, what the hell were those pellets suppose to do in the first place? They look like flowered dog biscuits.

  8. Jess

    Isn’t it great that we now have the power, in our own little way, to level the playing field with our writing? Now, bad service will not only lose the business of the recipient, but to a sizable population! Its sort of like how small towns used to work… word gets around too fast if you are a swine.

  9. Isabel

    There is nothing worse than shoddy service and bad manners when having had the courage to complain about something you’ve purchased with your hard earned pennies! Having said that, I’ve used Scotplants Direct and they delivered a 1st class service. When I called them to say I was a plant short they were very apologetic and sent one out straight away. All the plants I got from them grew and are still growing well. But, like you say it only takes an off day and they’ve ruined it!

  10. Susan

    I’ve found Scotplants Direct helpful and really friendly, that’s all the staff. I’ve also had items posted since visiting them, and not experienced any problems. I’d recommend to anyone. Never let one bad day ruin your outlook.

    • The IdiotThe Idiot Post author

      Well, let’s be frank: if they treated everyone like they treated some of us they’d be gone and long forgotten. They still owe me money, and a fair few others too.


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