The Idiot Gardener

WARNING: This site contains information on gardening, brewing, curing meat,

building shit and hunting, all done in a piss-poor manner. It is not suitable for the

feeble-minded, the weak and lame, those of a nervous disposition, vegans and

vegetarians (and those other ones that only eat fish and the occasional bacon

sandwich - I think they're called 'hypocrites'), those who practice any

manner of folk singing or dancing, people named Colin or fans of Barry Gibb.

All floppy and won’t stand up!

There’s a bloke who lives across the road from me. Let’s call him Andrew, because that’s his name. Not Andy; Andrew. He’s anal about..

At the theatre, and an urgent need to plant out!

Hello. I have been quiet, because … well, read on and all shall be revealed. Those poor deluded fools who regularly read this pile of old toss, maybe..

There used to be a thing called September…

Back when I was a lad and it was all fields around here, we had this thing called September. If I remember rightly, it was quite popular, lasted for 30 days,..

The great bean mystery

As many of you will be aware, last year was my first ever growing season, and the very first thing I grew was broad beans. These gave me a false sense of..


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