The Idiot Gardener

WARNING: This site contains information on gardening, brewing, curing meat,

building shit and hunting, all done in a piss-poor manner. It is not suitable for the

feeble-minded, the weak and lame, those of a nervous disposition, vegans and

vegetarians (and those other ones that only eat fish and the occasional bacon

sandwich - I think they're called 'hypocrites'), those who practice any

manner of folk singing or dancing, people named Colin or fans of Barry Gibb.

Sarah Raven Seeds Review

I started gardening on a drunken whim. It’s true; I genuinely hated gardening with a passion. It was when I suddenly woke up sober and realised what I..

Seed Addiction

Every high has a low, and as summer arrives many gardeners – the more extreme of us – will be hitting a low. The high of Spring has faded, and now..

Scoring that fix!

The journey there is exciting; it’s the anticipation. You have to remember to not constantly clutch the money in your pocket. Handing over money..

Sowing seeds in manure: what would Titchmarsh say?

You can’t sow seeds in manure. The experts say you can’t, so you can’t. Okay? Look, the likes of Titchmarsh, Fowler and Don didn’t just..

Spilling seed (and other knob references)

The rain is bouncing off the windows, the ground is a quagmire akin to the toilets at Luxor airport, and all is well with the world as I have no need to..

A Red Rag to a Bull

She was beautiful, her skin the colour of copper yet her eyes were icy blue and intense. An explosion of jet black hair cascaded around her face, and her thin..

The great seed robbery!

It is with a heavy heart that I am forced to report the great seed robbery. What is worse, what is upsetting and disheartening, is that I must also report that..

Fire and Theft!

I had no dilema about the recipient of my spare seeds. Apologies to the others, but once I got a message from Liz at Nutty Gnome, it was all over. If you read..

Germination – the Science of Seeds!

The other night, I settled down with a cold beer to watch Tottenham take on the San Jose Earthquakes in a pre-season friendly. Now, once I’d had a good..


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